WHERE DO CHILDREN COME FROM?
It often happens that a second child arrives when the oldest is three or four years old. At that age children are very curious and want explanations, and the sexual question is frequently one of their concerns.
WHAT TO KNOW ABOUT SEX EDUCATION FOR CHILDREN
The subject of sexuality is often very emotionally charged and therefore seems difficult to approach with any objectivity. While some see it as something dirty and an expression of our lowest instincts, others, wanting to depart from that position, assume an absolute tolerance for any sexual behavior, as if it should not be subject to any social rule.
In my opinion sex in itself is not bad or good. It is a natural function, necessary for life, and it is we who can channel it well or negatively. We can, in fact, orient it towards a loving and happy relationship that is the basis of a functional productive family able to find some happiness in this world.
We can also direct it towards darker and more conflictive practices, which may not provide true well-being to those who exercise them, and may also lead to the birth of children who will grow up in environments that do not provide them with the safety, love and guidance they require to become productive, happy adults.
HOW TO FACE THE SEX EDUCATION OF CHILDREN
Assuming you’re involved in a happy relationship, you’re already offering your little one the strong guidance to move in the same direction, since nothing speaks louder than example.
Many people seem to believe that sex education is something that is restricted to a particular situation, for example to a class that is taught in a classroom to young adolescents. Nothing could be further from the truth! Sex education begins, as we said, with the example that mom and dad contribute in their relationship, which, without doubt, is very important.
In addition, we cannot dismiss the influence the media has, not only for what the media may express, but mainly for the emotional responses they can generate, which determine tastes and attitudes that lead us to certain behaviors, without us being aware of why we execute them. This leads to the need to control the influence of these media (Bandura, 1987).
Another fundamental matter is the way you treat your child every time you breastfeed, bathe him, hug him, talk to him and look at him. If you do it in an affectionate way, you are offering the best messages towards a happy and enriching sexuality.
Finally, we must mention the way you approach the subject. The little ones must be spoken to truthfully and in a direct, clear way that is appropriate to their age, without generating more concerns than they already have. If you are attentive and respond promptly and kindly to their questions, your child will trust you when looking for answers on this topic (Knobel, 2013).
It is essential that your child knows that he is the result of a loving relationship between you and your husband, who through his penis placed a seed in your belly that grew to become the beautiful boy he is. The same will happen with the baby who is now in your belly and who will grow, be born and become his playmate.
More details about how to talk to boys about this topic, and how to take care to avoid being a victim of sexual abuse, can be found in WHAT DO I DO NOW? NO ONE TAUGHT ME HOW TO BE A MOM! especially in the subjects: What should I do if my daughter asks me where babies come from? And What should I do if I suspect my daughter is being a victim of sexual abuse?
You can also check in this same Blog Is she suffering sexual abuse? as well as visiting, Facebook Urquia Larralde (psykia), Twitter @psykia20 and Instagram @psykia20. I am grateful for the observations, questions, suggestions or criticisms that you may want to address to me through psykia20@gmail.com. Your comments will be welcome and I will gladly reply to them.
BIBLIOGRAPHIC REFERENCES:
Bandura, Albert (1987): Thought and Action. Social Foundations, Edit. Martínez Roca, Barcelona, Spain.Knoble, Joseph (2013): The Challenge of Parenting, Edit. Melvin C.A., Venezuela.
