As parents, we should be an enjoyable presence for the children! It’s the first thing we have to do, besides becoming a model worth imitating. Education is first and foremost, self-education. If we can’t win their respect and admiration, as well as their love and joy, we can achieve very little, or nothing at all inasmuch as their education. Just think, dear reader, about someone whom you admire greatly who shows you appreciation and affection. Quite possibly, that someone might exercise some vital influence over you. Imagine, on the contrary, someone for whom you feel no sympathy or respect…
My husband and I have been fighting and making up for a long time. He’s even left home several time, only to come back later when apparently everything is fine. I always feel confident that any effort to improve the relationship is worth a try; however, every time this happened we were soon right back fighting again. Finally, I realized that it was futile and I decided on a definite separation; however, now my problem is that our kids, especially our oldest who is six years old and is very rebellious, won’t accept our separation. My other boy is…
When we talked about the development of good habits, we mentioned that parents had to be very systematic and rigorous when granting rewards, because habits are exceedingly hard to modify. How often have we made a resolution to exercise weekly, or to avoid eating some particular food, or to stop smoking, etc. only to fail at our intent? Sometimes we even manage to do it, only to go back to our routine after a short period of time. I don’t mean to imply it’s impossible; rather, I want to emphasize the need to be very precise when granting rewards.…
I have a four-year old daughter, Patricia, who is very fearful. She’s afraid of storm, and whichever bug exists: cockroaches, spiders, large butterflies, cicadas… She makes me search every corner of her bedroom before she gets into bed, then she doesn’t want the light out, finally, near dawn, she’ll come to our bedroom. The worst part is that this doesn’t seem to be getting any better, on the contrary. My husband says I’m responsible for her behavior since the truth is, bugs also make me feel uneasy. GETTING TO KNOW CHILDHOOD FEARS You might start by asking yourself how…
Parents love having orderly children who put their toys away, and do their homework on their neat desks. On the contrary, when children are disorderly and leave everything strewn about the house, parents feel exhausted and unhappy. Parents tend to attribute such behavior to purported innate tendencies in the child. We often hear someone saying, he ‘turned out’ like his father, mother, or grandmother, etc.; this is simply not true. Those habits were learned, albeit it could also be due to the child’s own tendencies making him turn towards one or the other orderly/disorderly behavior of the parents who…
I don’t know what to do with my son; he’s five years old and still wets his bed. Sometimes I explain to him in a kindly manner that he’s getting old now and shouldn’t do it; he promises me he won’t do it again, but all the same, he’ll wet his bed the following night. Then I lose patience and scold him. Most importantly, his father reacts very strongly and asks him in an intimidating tone if he’s not ashamed of himself. Then Fernando, that’s his name, answers that no, he’s not ashamed. At that point his father explodes,…
Nowadays, the idea that parents should abstain from trying to influence their children has become very trendy. On a CNN interview to Zigala, that wonderful singer who merged flamenco with our Caribbean music, he said that he didn’t like the fact that his son was a fan of reggaetton-style music. In light of this, the presenter assumed, and in fact stated that the singer would refrain from making any remarks to his son regarding his questionable taste in music. To my great surprise, Zigala, answered: Of course I tell him what I think! I won’t forbid him to listen…
I have a two-year-old girl I am worried sick due to her lack of appetite. When I take her to the pediatrician I end up even more nervous, because he tells me that child malnutrition is dangerous and that I must help her develop good eating habits. However, I must not force her to eat, because it would increase her lack of appetite. He concludes by saying that I should not be nervous, of course! (Saying it is just so easy!) Although, it is extremely difficult for me not forcing her to eat when I have been told of…
Many, associate psychological action to psychoanalysis and, even worse, psychoanalysis to madness. Psychological action, on the contrary, is present in our lives practically from the moment we open our eyes until we close them. It is present in every interaction with other people, either directly, in our personal relationships, or indirectly, through television, books, and social media. In these interactions we could find an encouragement to follow the rules or to violate them, to be kind or hostile to others, to be persistent in our goals or to become indolent, and so on. It will be argued that everyone…
My four-year-old son, David, must arrive to Kinder-garden at eight o’clock. But he does not seem to understand that he must get dressed and eat breakfast on time. So, I end up dressing him myself or yelling at him to do it. I know he is old enough to get dressed and I also know that both methods are wrong. But what should I do? WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WHY CHILDREN DELAY WHEN GETTING READY You are right when saying that your child should dress by himself and this should not be a reason to be struggling daily.…